Message from Beyond

This afternoon, I prepared a sort of will-post of sorts.  It’s probably a good thing I did, because I’m already starting to get motion sickness from reading/typing on the bus and I’ve been doing it for about five minutes.  Here is what I had to say:

If you’re reading this, it means I am currently not a happy camper.

It means that I cannot connect to the wireless internet on the bus on which I am traveling.  It could also mean that I am wedged between an uncomfortably large person and the window and cannot access my laptop.  But it’s probably the first one.

Other things that are probably annoying me?  I’m sure the temperature on the bus is unpleasant.  I’m sure I’m already feeling antsy and annoyed that I had to leave dinner/drinks with the girls to get on this smelly vehicle. I’m probably pissed that, despite being a professional at getting a seat to myself, the bus has gotten to the point where someone has no choice but to sit next to me, despite my tricks and dirty looks that can literally move people.

I’ve probably spent a good deal of time TRYING to connect to the wireless service this bus company claims to provide.  I’ve probably tried it on my laptop AND my iPod.  I’m probably cursing technology and the world and the fact that New York and Boston are SO DAMN FAR AWAY.

The bus most likely didn’t leave on time, so I’m most likely calculating how late this will make me and throwing a silent fit about it.

It’s also likely that I’m kicking myself for not remembering to bring a snack or any kind of food onto the bus, as I’m getting hungry. Since I AM hungry, this will be one of those times the bus doesn’t stop at a rest stop. Not that fast food is what I really want right now, since I’ve lost 10lbs in the past 5 weeks and really don’t want to ruin the streak. ARE YOU TRYING TO MAKE ME FAT, BUS RIDE?! TRYING TO SABOTAGE MY DIET? WHY CAN’T WE STOP AT A SUBWAY?!

Anyway, as I mentioned, if you’re reading this, I’m not pleased.

But I had to prepare something in the event that the aforementioned disasters occurred, since [speaking of streaks] I’ve been doing so well with posting every day. I didn’t want to leave you with nothing to read.

To be honest, if I COULD post right now, it probably would have looked very similar to the above, just with more detail about the specific stench of the bus, the annoying qualities of the person squashed in the seat next to me who undoubtedly has no concept of personal space or the bus driver who is from the frozen tundra and likes things at an impossibly frigid temperature.

Though rest assured that the journey, however arduous, will be worth it.  For once I reach my destination, I will be in Boston. In a lovely place where everything is easier and simpler and just lovely.

Okay, so, as it turns out, connecting to the internet was so easy that a three year old could have done it.  Also, as it turns out, my mad skills have allowed it to be so that I am sitting alone, with only my backpack occupying the seat next to me. The bus smells normal and we left at 8:38, which is technically late but compared to Megabus is actually quite early.  There was a crying baby on board but the combination of my distance from it and my iPod voldume makes it a moot point.

All in all, I think it’s safe to say that I overreacted. I also didn’t consider the fact that, though I’m not pleased about having to leave them early, being with my friends immediately before boarding this bus has put me in the most glorious of moods. The cosmos didn’t hurt. These three girls are three of my favorite people on the planet. They are all coworkers of mine and quite frankly I always have a maqrvelous time when I am with any combination of the three of them.  And when the four of us are together? It’s truly amazing.

I feel very fortunate to have found them.

So despite the fact that I’m on a bus and will be for the next four hours and I’m slightly nauseous, I’m fairly content. So I apologize for the preemptive rant.

Hopefully the rest of the bus ride will be the opposite of rant-worthy.

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~ by Valerie Anne on 04/21/2011.

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