My Mind’s Voice

My thoughts are my mind speaking out loud. Not out loud for real, just out loud inside. It’s like a little voice all my own, but a voice that’s only me, cause I’m not crazy.

Sometimes my little voice talks fast about lots of things at once and I feel spinny. Sometimes it can’t remember how to talk of anything at all.

Music helps keep my thoughts from flying away. Like gravity, it keeps them close, pulls them together and all in order. Sometimes a few still float away but not so many.

When I watch TV or read, my thoughts are gone. Or maybe they’re there but they’re all on the TV or the book. But sometimes if they stay in the TV or the book for a long time, they come out different. They come out more like the thing they were in. If it’s a show set in England, they come out sounding funny and talking of tea and words like bugger they don’t normally talk of. If the book uses big fancy words with flowy patterns my thoughts sometimes come back like that. 

Sometimes I shake my head to tell my thoughts to go back to talking normal, because if they keep thinking like that they’re gonna make me forget and talk like that for real on the outside and then I’d be weird. I have to talk on the outside like I’ve always talked, mostly, so no one laughs unless I mean for them to.

Sometimes I try to write the way my thoughts are talking when they’re talking funny. I think that maybe other people are reading my words with their inside thoughts voices and it sounds like my inside voice. But maybe they always think with their own voices and their thoughts don’t change like mine do so maybe they just think it’s weird.  I hope they don’t think it’s too weird.

I hope your inside thoughts sound like my inside thoughts when I write them down the way their voice sounds in my head.

~ by Valerie Anne on 09/09/2011.

2 Responses to “My Mind’s Voice”

  1. I love the openess of your inside voice. I have only read one entry, but it sounds so promising that I will definitely read more.

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