He Said, She Said, I Said: Last Christmas

I would like to start off by saying that this is literally my favorite Christmas song. I am not exaggerating when I say that I have twelve versions of it in iTunes and that I could listen to all of them (either individually or as a group) for hours on end and never get sick of it. I have no idea what it is about this song that I love so much, but it has a hold on me and I just can’t quit.  I’ve found that it tends to be the songs that I’ve listened to a hundred times that end up being used in this category – eventually, the more you hear and think about a song, the more questions or comments you have about it. And so, I present to you, Last Christmas.

(Note: There seems to be general disagreement on the internet about the actual lyrics, so I’m choosing the ones that I agree with most.)

Last Christmas
I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away

Harsh. I think when they say to wait to break up with someone until after the holidays, they don’t mean literally the DAY after…

This year
To save me from tears
I’ll give it to someone special

Probably for the best. Also, consider keeping it. Might be safer that way. Though now I’m picturing an actual heart organ in a box, so let’s move on before this gets out of hand.

Once bitten and twice shy
I keep my distance
But you still catch my eye

“Once bitten and twice shy” is just about the sweetest thing ever, first of all. Second of all,  please tell me that you were walking at this distance you were keeping, not creepily standing and staring. Because that’s just not okay.

Tell me baby
Do you recognize me?
Well, It’s been a year
It doesn’t surprise me

I seriously hope the answer to this question was “yes”, because if this was someone so special that you gave her your heart at Christmas last year, there’s no way she should totally forget you and not even RECOGNIZE you merely a year later.

Happy Christmas, I wrapped it up and sent it
With a note saying “I love you”
I meant it
Now I know what a fool I’ve been
But if you kissed me now
I know you’d fool me again

I wish I could scold you for this, but I know the feeling, my friend. I know the feeling.

A crowded room
Friends with tired eyes

What kind of Christmas Party are you at that all your friends have tired eyes? Sounds depressing.

I’m hiding from you
And your soul of ice
My God, I thought you were
Someone to rely on
Me? I guess I was a shoulder to cry on

Why are you even at a Christmas party she’s at? I feel like you should probably have stuck with the aforementioned plan to keep your distance.

A face on a lover with a fire in his heart
A man under cover, but you tore me apart

Huh? First of all, I always thought you were saying “face-on lover”. Like, your passion was fiery and you were all HI, HELLO, I LOVE YOU, WHAT’S UP. Which is admirable. “A face on a lover with a fire in his heart” doesn’t make much sense to me. And the second line? You totally lost me. Was your girlfriend secretly a man? I’m confused. This line throws me off every time.

Now I’ve found a real love you’ll never fool me again.

Unless she kisses you. Also, I’m not sure how “real” this love is with this “someone special” if you’re singing a song to your ex in the meantime…

A face on a lover with a fire in his heart
A man under cover buy you tore him apart
Maybe next year, I’ll give it to someone
I’ll give it to someone special.

There’s that line again. Also, hold on. “Maybe next year” you’ll give it someone special? I thought you were doing that this year? I thought you already found your true love? Who are you lying to, her, me or yourself?

(Note: These are the lyrics from the original version. The subsequent versions can’t seem to agree on which pronouns to change in the verse about the man under cover, which makes me feel like they also share some of my same questions.)

Well, whoever you are and whatever you end up doing with your heart (this year or next), I hope it really does save you from tears. This is supposed to be a joyous time of year filled with joy, love and happiness.

Merry Christmas!

~ by Valerie Anne on 12/25/2011.

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